It took me a little time to actually dive into this book. I want to thank fellow bookstagrammers who included proper trigger warnings for the subject matter on this book because infertility and infant loss isn’t a trigger warning you see on many books.
Being someone who has struggled / is struggling with infertility and recurring miscarriage, I was a little apprehensive to dive into a book with this subject matter – I was afraid it would pull me back to my darker place. If you’re dealing with issues regarding infertility and infant loss, please only dive into this book when you feel ready.
I want to thank Granata for doing her research on this topic because within the first few chapters, I highlighted a lot of passages that highlighted exactly how I feel / felt about my own infertility.
This book takes you through the dark journey of two people who are currently living through and suffering in silence through their on respective person Hells.
Please note that this book also includes domestic violence.
Callie has suffered through recurring miscarriage and infertility in her otherwise “perfect” marriage. Callie and her husband have finally made the decision to stop trying for a baby but the damage infertility causes has ripped a hole in their marriage.
But the things we dream about aren’t always in the cards for us. They become nightmares, haunting us, reminding us of what we’ll never have, no matter how hard we try.
Cole moved into his sister’s pool house in California in an effort to escape the pain of his life in New York. For a while, he had the perfect life – a good paying job which was tolerable, a beautiful wife, and a beautiful life ahead of him – until one night when everything changed.
Callie and Cole come face to face and both make harsh assumptions about one another. But as Callie spends more time with her best friends broody and secretive brother, the more she realizes that despite the guilt he carries, he’s an amazing person.
When Callie has to escape the life she’s been living because of domestic violence, Cole is there to help her pick up the pieces and be her savior. These two continue to grow together and the more time spent, the more they can no longer fight their attraction to one another.
Callie: Callie is the most open-hearted, trusting, loving character. Despite all that the hurt her husband has caused her, she has a hard time seeing the darkness in him. Her struggles with infertility haven’t broken her spirit – it’s just changed that spirit – made her change her perspective on life.
Cole: Cole is insanely broken. The once happy-go-lucky man, has dealt with an unimaginable tragedy that lead to the loss of his love and marriage. Cole’s journey was similar to mine – my reaction to pain and loss was to self-isolate, push people away so that I could try to deal with the cracks within myself.
It takes a unique person to pull us out of that darkness and for Cole & Callie, they were saviors for one another. Luckily for me, my husband was my guiding light.
I want to thank Granata for touching on a subject that I fear not many people do. There are many feelings associated with infertility – embarrassment, pain, shame, heartache- and Granata did an amazing job capturing all of those emotions in this book.
I know she did her research, and for that, I am truly grateful. Despite this being fiction, all of the words in this book were written from actual events and pain. Some authors tap infertility in the past tense, or they just lightly touch on it, but I appreciate the risk Granata took to take us to a place that not many have attempted.